The writer in me.

I used to get disturbed , when ever I get into group talks. I don't know why , but even though I start talking with my big mouth soon I found myself answering with simply smiling. Its not that I'm not interseted in the talk or people used to say I got a quite smile. Its because when ever I tries to do a speech , words start scattering inside my mind and its hard to arrange them to proper meaning full way. When I did arrange them all , my mouth fails to express them in time. May be I am different from others or lack the skill of talking. I don't know what it is keeping me shut.
Now I find my hands can do it better than my mouth. The things that I want to express through my words ,find more freedom through my hands. Then I start to feel a writer inside me. I don't want to write with complex and hard words or want to create heavy imaginary dimensions for human emotions. All I want is to empty my mind by pouring the over flowing thoughts to a paper. May be this attitude of me is not enough to make you guys accept me as a writer. But I know one thing , I may not born to be a writer but the writting gives of some unexplainable pleasure and a window to express myself to the world.

Placement..???

3 years before I
join this MESCE
because ,they told me they got a high
placement status and pretty good campus. Lets forget about
campus ,I was really sacred of losing my placements because of my back papers. But
now i written all my exams and weighting for semester 5 results. The only question is now, will any company
come to our collage this year. Our placement cell
seems to be complitily
irresponsible and also all other guys in other colages have their placement in semester 5 or 6 and in semester
7. Guys do some strick for this kind of problems.

What is more beautifull in this life

After little rush of a busy day, I'm on the way back to home. Empty bus with low noise, actualy a KSRTC. The way remembers munnar beauty spots and rich with nature light. The song ocean eyes - firfiles on ears , which gives me breeze of love endless joy. Up on all this the love of nature fails over me, with thousand droplets. Whats more beautifull in this life. Its hard say am awake or asleep ....

Nothing in the dieing nature to play

My parents used to scold me a lot ,for spndng most of my time with this electronics gadgets and internet. They sad I'm wasting my childhood ,and explans to me how woundrful their was. But they forgot that, ther is nothing remains in the nature to play, like the have in their childhood for me. And itz there generation which burns our playgrounds. And now they are blaming us for that..

Glimpses of reality

There are few movements in life, in which we found ourself different, we are not the one whom we belived to be, not the one we are trying to prove day by day with pride. We are just another struggler of this complex world but falling to a imaginary world ,where we thought we leaves. This are movements of realisations in, we find ourself standing in the right shoes. It is a look of reconsideration, a way of looking back into our own life and learning form it. One is lucky if he has such movements in his life, this is the movement in which we know who really we are and can feels the heavy weight of ego falls down from us.
A lot of times we falls into this beautifull day dreams . Dreams that projects our ambitions ,as inner visions. But they are just illusions of our tricky mind. This merages make us think and belive that, the people around us are thinking in the way we want, and starts to judging them wrongly. This projections actual guide us into the shadows of great sorrow, and we will just wake towards it like a insect flying towards a candle light ,thinking thats the path of his destiny . But this candles will burn out themself in no time. In this burn outs we can feels loneliness with a silent pain. A pain actualy the crying of our most beautifull dreams. which is burning in the fire of reality. Only those who ready to learn from this layers of emotional cycling can find the real light, which will not out in the wind like a candle.
We are like blocks that fills up to build a huge structure, each and every block has its own importants and also seems unimportant from outside. Understand the position of your block and strengthen it, so that you't fall apart from the structure. That's the art of leaving . You can find lots of other blocks resting on your support ,and you yourself under other's support. No need feel ashamed for this, it just the way of creation ,a way to gain equilibrium in the world. All you have to do is to find your equilibrium and learn to flow according to the current..

Writing is a path..

I always wanted to write as beautful as the, heavenly rain falls. I dreament of flowing freely the rivers, expresing my feeling and thoughts. I wants to reach the wastness of the ocean and be the real me inside.
But when started I found that, my thoughts begans scatater like a rain drop that falls over a rughf floor. More of them falls, making me unable to focus. The more I tries the more confusing the world become..

But i do collected, a few for them, a few that I never let it go, a few that hurts me with a love pain , and put it in safe ...


Here..

Mazha vendum..

Oru
mazhakalam kudi varavayi. Sariravum manasum chuttupazhupicha eh vennal kalam eni ormakalil matharamayi marayatte.
Pacha pul methakalile mazhathullikalea thatti theripichu chadinadakunna pacha pulchadikalum, vayal varumbukalil mazhayude varum padi chadithimerkunna thavalakuttanmarum ennu kananilla.

Ormakalilea a kuttikalam.. annathe oro mazhakalum , poriveylathu evidaninno oru kulirkattu vannu kettipunarunathu pole sukamulla oro ormakalanu enn eniku. Achanum ammayum sarkar jolikaranu, athukonduthanea ennea enittea kunjammamar pandea ettaduthu. Angane njan janichu valarnath ente ammayude vettil.

Oru tharavadu enn onnum parayan pattila , pazhe oru tharavandinte ella parvudiyum ullkonda oru vedu. Chuttum entea prayattilpetta orupadu kuttikal. Kuttukara ennathil upari avarellam ente bathukal kudi anu. Ammayude achante sahotharangalum, avarude makalum perakuttikalum. Ella vedukalum onnichu cherthal athu oru tharavadakum, kerala mannil ennu thala uyarthi nilkunna oru tharavadu.

Mazha kalam ayal penea ake rasamanu, muttathum parambilum ayi orupadu mavukal und porathathinu perayum ,champayum. Mazha onnu kuranjal appo odum nilathu chitharivizunna kannimangal perukan. Chilappol onnum vizhilla ,pennea kayil kittumath eduthu eriyum. Eniku ishtam chambakkanu, ethrakittiyalum mathivarila, perakku kuro ullathu kondu korachu buthimuttanu thinnan. Mazhakuduthal aneal puratheku vidilla, pazhe nalla varika chakka undakum pattayathil, appolum kushal.
Edaku chila divasangalil mazha undakilla, appol padatheku pokum. Njaru nadan pakathinu muttolum vellathil cheli niranja kure padangal und njagaku. Cheliyil marinju kalikan thudangiyal penea vakuneram akum nirthan, allengil mazhavaranam, athum allengil balanmavan vannu odikanam. Mazha vannal adyam kure neram, mazhayathu thuklichadum dehathe chalipokanu ath. Enittu chempilayo vazhayilea oke parichu thalayichudi vittilaku odum. Allengil ammuma vazhakuparayum chilappo adikum.

Angane oru padu ormakal. Achanum ammayum aduth illathathil njan orupadu vishamichirnnu. Athu kondu thaneyanu avar vannu vilichappol ethu ellam upazhichu njan poyathu. Alengilum ene kondupoyena...
Ennalum njan ethrayo bhagyavan, ennathe kuttikale kanumbol. Ah ormakal ennum oru mazhayayi enni peyunnu.. .adutha mazhakalathina kathirikunnu..

Waves of mind

It's like waves, in the shore of my mind,
countlessly memories are hiting. I want to stop
them, and feels the calmnes of a empty mind.
But the more tries to I push them away, they
hits back with more, than I can ever take. Yes, I
cannot stop this flow of memories in mind by
force, even if I wish so. Now I found that, by
analysing the thoughts. We stop them from
spreading. But when I rubbs on thought another
take its position.

Urakam varunud..

Ei divasam engane kandupoyi ennu chodichal , 'eniku
uttaramilla'. Orupadu thirakukalilude kadannu poyi, pazhe
thirnju nokumbol oru satharana divasam. Akoshangalum niranja
vidikalilude, ashakal pokunna mansumayi nadannu nigumbol,
kandittum kananathe poya ethrayo kazhchakal.
Avayoke alochikumbol njan oru alpam
sowpnajivi ano ennu thonipokunnu. Ethupole
ethrayodivasangal kadanu pokunnu. Engane oronnu
alochichu irikunathum oru rasamanu. Nammale
thane noki chirikunna, vilayiruthunna chila nimishangal. Adikam
engane irikkan kashiyilla. Samayam vaykunnu sarirathinoppam,
manasum thalarunnu, eni onnu oraganam....

Aval ente pranayam

Jivitham oru nathi pole, cheriya thadasangale marikanannu, valya kunnukale chuttiyum nilakathe ozhukunnu.. Athinidayi., ente collage jivitham oru kuthiozhukku pole thudangi.
Oru puthiya lokam ,orupadu anubavangal ,orupadu suhurthukal. Ah thirakil evidayo vech ariyathe oru mukam ente manasil pathinju.
Adyam oru kavthukam anu eniku thoniyath. Avalku vallatha
oru akarzhakatha.. Pathukke ah kavthukam oru jignjasayayi. Avale patti ellam ariyanam enn oru thonal. Aval ente aro ayathupole oru thonal. Angane njan avale arinju thudangi. Ente hridya midippukalil polum avalude thalam njan arinjum. Ene pranayam enna mathrika jalam adimayakki.
Orupadu samsarikan undayittu oru vakkupolum avodu mindathe njan avale pranayichu, aval entethu mathram anu ennu eniku thoni.

Pazhe ariyum thorum aval enni ninnu akalukayanu, jathi vevastha enna vanmathil njangalkidayi njan uyarnu nilkunnu. Pazhe..Kalam ah mathilukale polikum enn eniku orappundayirinnu.
Enittum ente ishtam njan avalodu paranjilangilum, pazhe avalku athu
ariyam. Ah kannukalil oru kunju nazhathram eniku vendi thilangunath kanama. Enittu njan avalode adukam sramichilla. Njangalkidayil arth irambunna oru kadal ullathu pole enjan bhayakunnu, athu ente njan enna bhavam akam(ego)..
Alengil nazhtapedumo enna bhayamakam. Oru padu ashippichu, snehichu nazhtapedumbol
odakunna vedanayodulla bhayam..
Pazhe onnu eniku orappanu avale
njan snehikkum , eppol ennekalum..

Nalathe pakal

Avathi divasangal ennode thirum.. Nale vendum
b.tec kinte thirakukalilude yathra thudaganam..
Chilappol oke mathiakan thonarund eh kannu
pothikali. Vidhyabyasam kachavadam akumobol,
kozhiporile povane pole aroko vendi poruthi
marakunu. Adutha vittile kudiyude marku vachu
swantham kudikale vilayiruthunna mathapithakal orkuka, nale
avar nigaleyum vilayirithum. Annu ethu mathi akilla.
Ake veruppu thonunna collage jivitham...Pazhe chila sopnagalum,
ormakalum enna vendum pidichu nirthunnu evide, niram magiya eh
kalalayathil...

Athirathram

Athrirathram..
Yanjagalil entavum mahatharam. Koduchudil mazhakathu nilkunna vezhambale pole manushan uzharumbol. Eh bumiyile sarva charachangalum eswara chaithanyamayi kandu puchichu.. Pagirthikulla nevadyaum arppicku kazhanal.. Mazhaku vendi olla kathirippu. Sarva ayiswaragalum thugiki mazha pdyum ,sasthram.. Oru pazhe ethu varum sangalpam akam. Pazhe eh mazhakarukal kallam parayillalo..

Kodum chudile jevitham.

Eh chudu eniku thangan akunilla. Etho cholayil pettupoyathu polea. Pragurthiyude eh kanalattam ennu therum.. Atho njan erinjodungumo?

Nature will starts to fight back

We humans r distoryng the nature as we own it, like
we r unqustnable as we rules , we thinks we r
super power n crushs anythng coming cross..
For those day dreamrs , i hv smthng to show ,just
look at japan ,look at american turnados, look at
asian heavy rains, n see wat d nature is capable f.
N how we standng like aweak viewer. Wish the
god wn't feels humans r nt worth to leav.

Feb 13th night

The night cools with loving breez, but the warth of loving hearts hetting ups evry city shops.
Every one is exited to buy somthing as ther love gift.
Its nice 2 stand here alone looking at this incents hearts with only prayer. May they never breaks apart.

Love

No matter who u r or frm whr u r or wat u r.
If u looks deep into ur heart, u can see a empty space whch can only be fill by love. And tatz y evry one fails infrnt of love.

Become's a fan of Twilight

Today jan29,
for the firsttime in ma life, I saw d movie twilight.I know lot of guys talking around me saying ,how cool is that movie, but I never cared that much about it, untill I say it.
Now am totaly out of words. It got that passion of love that. If you see it, you will die to get a lover, and if already have one, then you will hold her so hard that, never gonna let her go.. I mean it guys.

Am not mad

I own u an apology. For all that i hard done to u. I never ment to do anythng, bt am gone so uncontrolable. U mst be thnk am mad, bt its love..

During a summer walk

Summer sun shines like never before. The dry winds sucking every moster from my face. Dry land feels like a fire bed. What happens to this seasons, did they to thinks, that a change is requires. I dn't knw..

Kathirikunnu

Avale njan orupadu snehichu poyi..
Athukonduthane orikalum avalk oru syalliyam akathe njan sukshichirinu
Pakzhe..
enea pole arikum avale snehikan pattunillallo,

That's i can do for her.

Nine njan orupadu snehichirinnu. Pazhe ninak athu orikalum manasikan kazhiyila enn njan arinjappol.

Ath verum oru thamsa ayirinnu enn njan soyam vishawasichu. Ninea viswasipichu.....

My dream girl

Am going to the world of dreams. Where ma love ,kills the reality.
I dn't knw who she is, bt her laghfter fills ma eyes with joy, her voice taks me to heavn..
She is my only warmth. I want her to be mine for ever.. still I dn't who she is, but I can feel her,in ever I go, n watevr i hear..
Still ,In search of love..

Why afraid?

Nothing last for ever. No woundz are ther that time cn't heel. Everything around us are changing even love and friendship.
Not even our memories stay close.
Then still ,why are we afrd to leave..

Puthu jivan

Hridayathil thololicha ah ormakal eni venda., prathishayode kattirunna nalukal maraneku., ninte vazhile ni anubavikunna suhurbanthathinte chodil. Eni mayangam.. Aroundum oru regretsum ellathe ennum..